Chasing guests who haven't RSVP'd, without being a pain
A guest who hasn't replied has rarely decided to ignore you: they forgot. A well-timed, short reminder with the link almost always fixes it.
When should you chase guests who haven't replied?
A few days before the deadline, then once more just after. Too early is annoying; too late leaves you no time to adjust food or catering.
If you didn't set a deadline, now's the time to add one: it shows on the invitation and gives latecomers a cue. Usual lead times are in when to send invitations.
Which reminder messages should you send?
Short, warm, with a concrete reason and the link. The reason ("I'm shopping on Thursday") makes the nudge feel natural rather than pushy.
- "Quick reminder for Saturday: are you coming? One tap here: [link]"
- "I'm booking the caterer on Thursday, can you confirm? [link]"
- "No worries if you can't make it, just let me know here so I can plan: [link]"
- "Hi parents, last call for Lily's party: please reply by tomorrow evening [link]"
Can reminders be automatic?
Not at the moment: Invitotte doesn't send emails, neither invitations nor reminders. You remind people by private message, with the general link or the guest's personal link (the 🔗 button in your list), and that's also what works best: a message from a friend gets read, an automatic email gets lost.
No texts either: phone reminders go from your own number, through the WhatsApp or SMS button or by copying the link.
How do you avoid having to chase at all?
Make replying easy and visible. A button to tap, a visible deadline and a clear reason to answer make the difference.
- A link with one-tap replies rather than an image (see WhatsApp invitations)
- A deadline written on the invitation
- Allow "maybe": a maybe beats silence
- A fun question that makes people want to reply (playlist, guess the baby's due date)
What about guests who never reply?
Call the close ones and count the rest as not coming. A guest who hasn't replied after two nudges rarely turns up unannounced, but keep a small margin.
To estimate that margin without made-up numbers, see guest no-shows. And if the term itself is a puzzle, what RSVP means.
How do you nudge without offending anyone?
Assume the guest forgot, not that they're ignoring you. A light tone and a practical reason are all you need.
Avoid guilt-trip messages ("you still haven't replied…") and group nudges that single people out. Leave an easy way out: "no worries if you can't make it" makes a "no" easy, and a "no" beats silence. For close family or older guests, a phone call often feels warmer than a message, and you can enter their answer yourself afterwards.
Should you change the deadline if lots of people haven't replied?
Only if you can still adjust your plans. If the caterer needs numbers on Friday, keep the deadline and call the last few people instead.
If you do have slack, pushing the deadline back by a few days and saying so in your nudge ("I've extended RSVPs to Sunday") gives everyone a fresh cue. On Invitotte, changing the deadline reopens replies straight away through the same link.
Frequently asked questions
How many times can I nudge?
Once or twice is the norm. Beyond that, a call works better than a third message.
Should I nudge in the WhatsApp group?
Better privately: only non-repliers get the reminder, and nobody feels singled out.
Can a guest reply after the deadline?
No, on Invitotte replies close once the deadline passes. You can push the deadline back or enter their reply yourself.
Does Invitotte remind guests for me?
No, Invitotte doesn't send emails or texts at the moment. You remind people yourself with the link, by WhatsApp, text or private message, on any plan.